Frozen

Cold Turkey

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There’s been a change. A big change. My kids have been addicted – and I mean full-scale, outrageously, what have I done to my kids, addicted – to screens. It became our way of life, of coping, of persuading, of cajoling. And I hated it. I didn’t know my girls anymore, except for their tastes in shows. Our place is a mess and even more frustratingly so, is a giant mess of things that are not played with except in passing. Why bother having toys and activities for children who just stare at a screen all day? 

Behaviour, too, was becoming problematic. Some of it could be attributed to their ages and the normal developmental milestones that come with these particular ages. S, for example, is in a “First, no”, stage, where whatever you offer or ask is replied with a “NO”, even if it’s something she loves. Fun times. But behaviour which is demanding and needing something now and not being able to wait or focus or listen to real people or negotiate in play? Problematic, and causing my stress levels to escalate. 

I was doing lots of reading about the effects of screens on kids. I was seeing lots of helpful ways to ease them off screens. I was starting to work some of these things into our lives. It felt about as effective as watching grass grow. But all the advice was, ease them into it, remember they have to learn new skills and you have to learn new ways, too. Be kind to yourself and to them. 

Cool, cool.

Also, there’s the parenting advice of don’t make empty threats. Make a consequence (not punishment, we don’t use that word anymore do we) that fits the behaviour you’re wishing to change, and then make sure you follow through. Great.

Now. Let’s look at a few of weeks ago. S had napped at daycare. Groan. E and S were bouncing off the walls not going to sleep that night. I tried all sorts of things, pulling snippets from SO MANY posts I have read recently. Nothing worked. Even if something started to work with one of them, the other one would start giggling or playing and set off the one who was starting to settle. I couldn’t stay in the whole time. They were happy, for sure, and as I started to do some work I could hear “Next patient!” At nearly 8.30, I was back in their room and just lying on the floor crying while they stuffed around. Glenn came in and said very sternly, “No. More. IPad. Ever.” And walked out.

S lay down straightaway and was asleep within 3 minutes. E took a whole lot longer because she’d listened to the words. Like, just for tomorrow morning? Are we giving it away? Can we get a new one then? You mean – we can’t use the iPad??? Mostly in order to get her to sleep, I said they may be able to earn it back. I must admit, it’s been more than four weeks and I haven’t worked out an Earn Your iPad system yet…

Do my girls sleep better at night? Um, no. I haven’t been able to sew much for some time now. I feel worn out to the point of taking time off work yesterday in order to deal with the things I needed to do for E and then sleep. Do they still demand something right now? yesBUT I am pleased to report that I am more able to respond with a soon or a not now or a you’re next and that they are better able to accept it and wait. When the answer is actually no, C and E are much much better at responding with, “Oh, okay”, without pleading or whining or sulking about it.

Do my girls still want to be on the iPad first thing? Sigh. Yes. But not always. They know now that they won’t get to watch it during eating time, either, and I may have that question asked of me once a weekend. Maybe twice, but the response is never argued with.

Admittedly, this has not been the cold turkey change I had thought we were doing. C, not a perpetrator in the particular bedtime battle that started this, and also being a Big Girl who has homework that requires screen time, is allowed to use the iPad in the evenings. Also if girls are at daycare and she has done everything we ask of her. A few weeks ago, S was too sick for daycare so, in order for me to be able to work at least a little bit, she was allowed on during the day. I’m now, shall we say, adept at finding Christmas Elsa, Blue Elsa, Let It Go Elsa and Ice Elsa. Sometimes when girls have been awake super early (4am is now light so days start early) and I have really needed to get work done, I have relented and let the iPad come out. Generally, though, the iPad is not a Big Thing anymore.

Which has meant that I can watch a movie with them on the weekend and really enjoy it. All of us watching together, for the most part. Snuggles happen. Fast-forwarding of scary bits happen. More snuggles and cuddles and hand holding and hair stroking and just enjoying this experience. Screens are back to where they should be, as a treat and Sometimes Thing and not a right. I still feel like I need about eight times more Me Time in the day, but I have reduced the Mum Guilt by a LOT and I am enjoying being a mum soooo much more.

What We Read This Week (27/09/2025)

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You know when kids just get on a roll with a book? That’s all they want to read or have read to them. For three days. Or for a week. Or for, you know, 3 months. Not that I minded reading Ruby Red Shoes every night for 3 months when C was 2, but it is a memorable part of my ‘reading to children’ history. 

I feel we are in the same situation here now. Possibly. Frozen (aka “The Big Elsa Book”) has been going strong now for well over a month. The push-pull Snow White book (aka “E’s Snow White Book”) is enjoying a similar level of popularity. In fact, we went away for a couple of days this week and when I asked girls to pack one book each, those were the choices from S and E. C picked a Dragon Girls book. I don’t think she read any of hers, but the other two had a bit of Frozen while traveling, and E and S both had quiet moment of resetting with their favourite books.

S has also been asking a lot for We’re Going On A Bear Hunt. We will sometimes even be suddenly in a game of this while on the way to daycare. I will notice that her walk changes from just walking or just running or being Elsa to the pantomime of hunting and obstacles and I’ll hear her sweet voice in a sing-song of “We’re going on a bear hunt, I got my rinoculass”. Very cute. And when we join in, she is over the moon.

Another book that has found new favour is The Princess and the Wizard (Princess Eliza), a Julia Donaldson book but not illustrated by Axel Scheffler. Rather, Lydia Monks has done the illustrations and so it feels like it’s in a different world. C will read this one to the younger two, as well, doing all the voices to squeals of laughter. It has to be managed, shall we say, at bedtime. I might start a collection of Books That Are Only Allowed To Be Read Once, Maximum Twice, At Bedtime. So far: Princess Eliza, Pig the Fibber. On the Never At All At Bedtime Under Any Circumstances: The Book Without Words.

I am loving reading Anne of Green Gables to C. It was one of my favourite books when I was young. Admittedly, I was much older than C when I read it but I was reading it myself. I hadn’t realised what a slow start it was, but that is proving useful for setting up a scene for C. I see many similarities between my C and Anne. I think C has realised this, too, and loves having a character similar to herself but also is very thankful that she is not at all in the same situation in which Anne started. Side note, this particular copy is riddled with typos. I am not a book-mangler or noter, but I think I will be going through and correcting this one for future. I don’t know much about how publishing works, but come on. This is a classic. Anyway, two nights in a row now I have read a bit (or a lot) and C has been asleep within 5 minutes. Rare but welcome.

What We Have Been Reading (13/09/2025)

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The eagle-eyed among you, or the regular readers, may note a different title than usual. But you may have noticed I haven’t posted much for a little while, either, so that explains the former. Life has been busy – good busy, which really means I have had lots of work to do when children are sleeping, which cuts down on my writing time. (I have noticed, though, what a difference this writing makes to my life. The combination of alone-time without 15 ‘mummy’s a second, a cup of sanity tea, and the process of expressing myself and often working through problems as I write, just helps life.)

Books have featured heavily in our lives lately. There was Book Week. Which meant there was a lead-up to Book Week, too, with lots of reading. Last week had a pupil-free day and so my parents came down to see the girls and took them book shopping. C has been off school all this week and one of her screen-free activities was reading. Another was helping to tidy the girls’ room. C is a kid who needs very precise instructions, as well as a different take on things. “Tidying” doesn’t go down so well. I get the rolled eyes and body flop of “This is the worst, most boring thing in the world that you have asked me to do and I protest”. Ask her to make an area look nice, though, and she excels. If there are too many things in that – like, put the books away AND fold the blankets AND stack the cushions AND put all the little things that accumulate and drive me nuts and why do we even have them – those things in the pouches on the door, well, that’s just too much. Stick to one thing at a time and it works.

At the bookstore with my parents, S got right into it. Like we were at a library with no limits on loans. The stroller very quickly had a stack of books in it, then she sat down and had my dad read Peppa Pig stories to her for the rest of our time there. Which meant, unfortunately, that I put all her choices back and we got home to “Where’s my fish book?” – oops. Mum bought her Mr Archimedes’ Bath by Pamela Allen, and she has listened to it but not asked for again. E quite enjoyed it, though. Mum had a particular book in mind for C, a chapter book by David Walliams. Mum worried that it was too big for her. I raised an eyebrow and told her that the Penny books (Penny Draws A Best Friend and that series) that mum gave her the first one of, you know those really thick chapter books, C will read one of them in a weekend. Sure enough, C started her new book that afternoon and read it at every opportunity, finishing it before we left for a birthday party at 8.45am Saturday. She loved it.

E’s choice in the bookstore was a Snow White book. We already have two Snow White stories, one in the Ultimate Princess book and one as an early reader. I said no. The one E wanted was a simple board book version. I said no. E refused all other suggestions. I figured this was not a battle I needed. I relented. Guess which book has been the most-read, most-loved, taken-to-daycare (and home again) book. Yup. All the girls love it. It’s one of those board books with push/pull/slide, and the story words rhyme, and I put in extra bits for the action parts. E can’t read yet but knows all the words, and when she or C read it, they put in all the action parts, too. S has had screaming tantrums at bedtime because she wants E’s Snow White book. I have read it while sitting next to her. I have read it while sitting next to E. I have read it while sitting next to E and holding it up so C can see it from her bunk. I think… I think it was a good choice of book.

E has lately started ‘needing’ a story so she can sleep. Wait, after two stories she’ll be able to sleep. Yes, two stories and then she will sleep. Wait, because she is four now… After four stories, she promises she will go to sleep. And apparently, reading Pig the Fibber (one of the Pig the Pug stories that has recently come back into the limelight and has my girls squealing with laughter) four times doesn’t count as four. Humph. 

S is still obsessed with The Big Frozen Book and because C put all the books away I haven’t been able to find (yet) The Small Elsa Book. The Bluey Summer Treasury has also been pored over lately, as has The Very Hungry Caterpillar. C has been reading Geronimo Stilton as well as all the Roald Dahl collection. Also, C and I finished Little Women – apparently the last two chapters were booorrriinnggggg but I get that that was boring for a 7-year-old who has little experience of the world. I loved that it had several elements pertinent to our family, though, like the part where the girls decided to have a break from their chores and then their mother let them have it and it was chaos. Rather pertinent to our weekend, actually, as we have an inspection on Monday so my days are spent picking up Disney coins and hair bows and tissues and pencils and no you can’t do painting today because nobody cleans up afterwards and also could you please just this weekend please leave your quilts and pillows on your beds and maybe somebody could help me make this place just a tiny bit nicer so I can actually clean it before we have a total stranger coming in to take photos of our mess to send to the owners and WHO EMPTIED THE ACTIVITY TUB and OH MY WORD WHO PAINTED THIS ON THE WALL. Humph. Fortunately, even though C is the leader of “Don’t give away our toys”, she also really appreciates and relishes a calm/uncluttered/clear space, so when I put everything on her bunk into two (that’s right, TWO) large garbage bags to be stored FOR NOW in the wardrobe, she was ecstatic. 

Bonus of clearing spaces – girls can stretch out on the floor to read and choose books. Love. C and I are now reading Anne of Green Gables, which we started a while back but didn’t get very far. We are loving it this time around, though. It was always a favourite of mine and it is really something special to share a much-loved book with the next generation of readers.

Book Week 2025

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In my Catching Up post I promised a more expansive recounting of Book Week 2025, so here it is. First up I will mention that this only covers the younger two, as C’s school does the parade in fourth term, and I love that the school has recognised that Book Week is big and also when it falls – in the middle of term 3, right after Science Week and the Brisbane show holiday which is around when the school fair also happens, plus it’s the end of winter – might overload some kids or make Book Week and the love of reading just another thing to tick off the list in the middle of a busy term. 

Last year, I was probing Book Week ideas from about May. E was, after all, wanting Room on the Broom every single night from about then. She didn’t waver, and I made her a skirt and a cape for her to be the witch. Which, happily, doubled up for her Halloween costume later in the year. Win. S was tricky last year, but she did have a tendency to pick the Bob Bilby book, so having made beautiful items for E, I hemmed a length of light purple (lavender? Lilac?) material, cut a hole for the head, attached a pink panel, and sewed up a bit of each side while C helped me put bilby ears on a head band. Very simple and quick and didn’t quite make it through the day but that’s ok.

This year, I only started thinking about this in late June, early July. Just a question here or there when I’ve read the same story multiple times AND can see how I might manage a costume for a character. This year, I was sure I would be sending a princess along. E’s choice for a little while was Belle from Beauty and The Beast. The village Belle? (Which I can totally manage, no problem). No. Yellow Belle. The ballgown Belle. Ah. Not so simple. Pausing on that idea. Then I started asking S. Are you Slinky Malinki? NO, I’M S! Are you a princess? NO, I’M S! (Put that on repeat for maybe another five characters). Are you… Anna? (Pause, in which I see her straighten her back and feel E change next to me). YES I’M ANNA! E: mummy?    Mummy? I’ve changed my mind I want to be Elsa.

Rewind a few years, to C’s first Book Week at daycare, aged about 17 months, I guess. A parade of movie characters had me rolling my eyes and internally raging against dress up events and reading losing its meaning, yada yada yada. My kid would always go as a real book character. I’ll pause while you have a good chuckle.

In my defence, we already had a very simple Frozen book, “I Am Elsa”, but I had a look in Kmart for any others. “The big Frozen book”, as it’s called in our family, was found and bought and has been read most days. Yes, Anna and Elsa are movie characters. But also yes, they are also in books that are thoroughly enjoyed by my girls so who’s to get snooty about it? Ahem. 

In any event, before I had started any sewing, E did another “Mummy, wait. I changed my mind. I want to be a ballerina for Book Week”. Okay… we’ll have to find a book with a ballerina in it, then. “Yes. Can you write me one please”. Hahahahahahaha no. As we already had ballet costumes ready to go, this choice was a relief. We’ve borrowed books from the library with ballerinas in them so I wasn’t going to argue or fight over this one.

Last Friday, armed with a screenshot of a Frozen cake topper, I took E and S to Spotlight to find fabrics. They were quite wonderful in finding material to match the colours of the skirt, the bodice, the bag – wait. The bag? Anna has a bag in that cake topper so mummy can make a bag for the costume. We also found a ribbon to edge the bodice and pom pom trim for the cape. Exciting. Extra information, I had been allocated more than my stated capacity for extra work (you know, in my paid job), and taking on definitely one sewing project, maybe two or three rather heightened my stress level but also my organisational level but also entirely reduced my capacity to do basic household tasks like sorting washing. 

Daycare does two dress-up days for Book Week, as not every kid is enrolled every day. This year, dressing up could be, if they wished, Wednesday or Thursday. With the sewing I was doing, Thursday. Just Thursday. Thursday was great. Tuesday evening, E gets home and tells me with a very serious face – the sort of face I imagine she’ll have when I mess up the school calendar and think the science project is due next week instead of tomorrow – that they had to dress up tomorrow. Wednesday. Noooo. You can dress up Wednesday OR Thursday. OUR TEACHERS TOLD US TOMORROW. Thankfully, the Little Red Riding Hood costume I had bought for C when she was this age – the week that S was born and I caved and bought something instead of making but thank goodness it gets a lot of wear – was clean and wearable and still fitting E. Also thankfully, S didn’t insist on wearing a costume that day, too. Also, I love that we have two Little Red Riding Hood books.

Wednesday night, I finished sewing on the bodice ribbon and sewing the cape together and adding trim and doing buttons. (If you’ve been paying attention, I did not have time to make the bag.) I went to bed just before midnight, thoroughly happy with myself and my creation, and itching to see S’s reaction and wearing it in the morning. First thing in the morning I said, “It’s Book Week dress up today!” S: “I go as Mickey Mouse”. No. Noyoudon’t. When S saw the Anna outfit though, she did a gasp and “Is that my Anna?” One. Happy. Mummy. Getting dressed, and E got into her ballet costume fairly easily on her own while I put S’s dress over her head. S saw E. I tried to do up the snaps on the Anna dress. She refused to let me. “I WANT TO WEAR MY BALLET!” But you’ve been wanting to be Anna for ages! I knew I was tired and more invested in a dress than perhaps I should be so I walked out to take some deep breaths. Glenn came in to save the day with early birthday presents (dinosaur heads with a lollipop inside) and S was then more than happy to wear her Anna dress and cape and look at the love hearts and pockets and IT’S GOT POM POM POM POMS! 

I am happy to report that she was in character for much of our trip to daycare. I managed to get some lovely action-in-nature shots of her. We opened the door to her daycare room and were met with a sea of colourful polyester and I felt even better. One of her birthday presents was a purchased Elsa tutu dress which she wore all of Friday and Sunday but then Sunday evening it came off and she wanted her Anna dress on. And the cape has been worn several times – I mean, who wouldn’t want to wear a pom-pom trimmed cape?! 

There have been many articles this year about Book Week and is it losing its meaning and is it too much stress on parents and kids. In those years when I wasn’t aware when it would be, I always got a surprise – but then managed a costume with what we had around. Looking ahead and finding out when it will be and planning costumes, though, is part of the happiness of parenting for me. One thing I absolutely love about Book Week is talking about books with my girls for weeks or months beforehand, and finding out more about THEM. What style of book are they into. How do they imagine an outfit for this character will look. If we were in that world, what would they have around them. I absolutely love this insight into the brain of each of my girls. Thank you, Book Week.

What We Read This Week (12/07/2025)

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E: Can you read me a story? Me: Okay, but it’s already really late, so see if you can just listen without asking lots of questions, okay? E: OKAY! Me: Right. Which story would you like? E: PrincessAuroraSleepingBOOOdy. Me: A long time ago, a king and queen held a party to celebrate the— E: What was the queen’s name? 

Yeah. That’s how well we do.

Now. I had a realisation this week. Wait, some history first. When I was a little kid, I loved princess stories and movies and outfits. I didn’t ever have those dresses or anything, and as I was #3 child with brothers all around, princess anything was usually overruled. When I was older, I shied away from the princess stuff. Waiting for your prince, having to have a prince come and save you from the dragon or the spell or whatever, was so at odds with the independent, feisty, women’s lib DIY person I was. I thought, if I ever have girls, they’re not getting to watch princess movies or read princess stories. No. Way. But then Frozen came along. Another “True love’s kiss” thing to save the poor princess – but wait! Sisterhood! Okay, Frozen is allowed. Then I watched Beauty and the Beast, and that was another without a damsel in distress being saved by the handsome prince. It’s allowed.

With this Ultimate Treasury of Princess Stories that is the current go-to book, there are five princess stories. I have been asked to read them A LOT over the last couple of months, and have come to a realisation. There is much in these stories that can prompt discussion, shall we say, about differences in how we live now, in this country, and also much to prompt relationship discussions. Now. Princess – or normal girl who marries a prince therefore becoming a princess – who lives her life true to herself and her values – tick. Princess who pines for her prince, wanting a man to come along and save her – babow. 

Let’s assess. Snow White. Victim of a psychopathic narcissist. Pines for a prince. Looks after the men. Kissed by a prince which breaks the spell and MARRIES HIM STRAIGHTAWAY. Not so keen on this one. 

The Little Mermaid. Controlling father. Always interested in humans. A bit of lovesick nonsense. She saves HIM. Victim of evil witch. Actually has different endings, depending on which version you read or see … it’s okay. 

Cinderella. Works hard. Finishes her work and still gets to go to the ball, where on her own merits she and the prince fall in love. Follows the rules and is home on time. Prince does some work to find her. Tick. 

Beauty and the Beast. Prince needs to get over himself. Belle loves reading and is firm on her morals. Sticks up for truth and justice. Prince and Belle spend time together and fall in love over time. Contrast with Gaston who doesn’t want Belle reading or doing things that make her who she is, just to be his wife. Beast does what’s right for Belle, not him. Belle sticks ups for the Beast in front of an angry village mob. Big tick. 

Sleeping Beauty. Arranged marriage. Set to be married as early as possible – I know times change and all that, but 16 is still super young, and when it’s arranged by the dads it just comes across as creepy. Keeping secrets from her about who she really is “for her own good”. Pines for a prince. A bit of teenage angst. Taken home to be married against her will. Goes off on her own anyway and nearly dies. Prince battles to get to her. Kisses her. She lives. They get married. Big no. (I’ve been thinking about this one a lot today. So many things could have changed to avoid this. Not impressed).

I still read them when requested, but I now add commentary – and just answer allllll the questions that are peppered throughout anyway – and the No’s score much, much more commentary. 

There have been other books this week, too. Yesterday, to be mischievous, C had them all taking every single book off the shelves in the living area and taking them to their bedroom. When I then couldn’t open the door, I told her to make sure all the books went back to the bookshelf. What she interpreted that as was to get all the clothes off E’s shelf in the wardrobe and throw them about the floor, too, then move the shelf to the hallway and put the books on that. I can see where she’s coming from aesthetically, despite the lack of practicality, but this turned into playing library, so as I was sorting washing I was hearing the quiet thud, thud, thud, of books being put on shelves, E reading quietly to herself and then saying, “Here you go. Next book please!”  – not at all quietly – and S reading picture books aloud before, “The end. Here you go. That one, please!” So for all that the room was diabolical and of course, no-one cleaned it up before bedtime so I had to do all of that before bathtime and then E got into bed later and wanted the elephant toy of all things and of course I didn’t know where it was… Hmph. Anyway – lots of books were “experienced”, as they say. 

S has also been having a few wake ups from the cold, and if she is having trouble getting back to sleep, I am asked to read her a story. The Magic Beach, The Tale of Mrs Tiggy Winkle, and Never Pop a Penguin have all been quietly read in the dark by a mum who is falling asleep after every three words or so.

C and I are reading little bits of Little Women every night. It actually made me cry the other night, with the note from Mr Laurence to Beth with the piano. But that was followed by the gales of laughter from both of us over the limes and the girls’ reactions to the limes.

Meanwhile, S turns 3 soon, in the same week as Book Week. Asking for character ideas is tricky because E keeps telling me what she wants to be at Halloween. I’ll work on it.

What We Read This Week (Frozen, so much Frozen)

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This was the week of Frozen. 

Last week, I watched Encanto with C during one of E’s lunch naps (the movie was a big hit). And then C got into the habit of wanting to watch a movie every time E was having a lunch nap. We watched Toy Story 2. Then she wanted to watch Frozen. And the next day, also Frozen. And the next day… She hasn’t watched it every single day but it was 3 or 4 days in a row. In the evenings, she would tell me her favourite bits while she was meant to be going to sleep and she would giggle and squeal as she acted them out for me as well.

A few months ago, having bought something for E that she actually needed, I thought there might be sibling strife if I didn’t find something for C as well, and came across the Frozen book. It is short and simple, giving the briefest of plot synopses from Elsa’s point of view. C, in her recent Frozen obsession, asked me to read it while I was feeding E her dinner. And again. And then at bedtime. And then every night, once or twice or sometimes more.

Thank goodness it is a quick read.

E is always gravitating to the Very Hungry Caterpillar but is also really getting into Bob Bilby. Even if she’s more interested in climbing over my shoulder or over the arm of the sofa, when we get to the fireworks at the end, she is back and paying full attention and touching the pictures and opening and closing the book. We’ve got a winner here.